Only In Dreams - A Tribute to the Life of Leonard Orr

From Hanuman (The Monkey God):

‘When I don’t know who I am, I serve you.

When I know who I am, I am you.’

I had sat-in on Leonard Orr’s single-hour lecture series’ on several occasions as he embraced his senility consciousness with both grace and ardour. On one particular occasion, he mentioned the hopeful opportunity of his mentor, Grand Master Babaji, visiting each of us, mere eager and attentive, practicing immortals - in our own times. The concept was not only exhilarating, it actually seemed plausible. That was, and is, the beauty and power of Leonard: packages of deep truth and beauty delivered through those glistening eyes with that unforgettable, all knowing and embracing smile. Whenever you were near Leonard there was no denying the radiant energy around him. The man was clearly blessed.

In his lifetime, Leonard had made it his mission and soul purpose to explore ‘physical immortality’ as a plausible practice. Facing death on multiple occasions, his courage led him to seek out an older wisdom. A wisdom that had been lost in the quagmire of misinterpreted deathist-orientated religion and advancing modern science and its thirst to define a treatable and rational outcome. A wisdom that lay in truth and understanding. Non-quantifiable or justified by limited means. Truth through mastering thought. Taught by observing and witnessing - Babaji.

Personally, I was just enlightened right there and then after listening. I was excited. Really? I mean, really? Had I just heard this right? A larger energy source from a divine pool could come and visit me whilst on planet Earth? No way! Well I left feeling fabulous. My cells were literally sparkling! I wondered with optimism whether this opportunity would bless me in my lifetime, or not? Eitherway, it gave me a sense of fulfilment and higher guidance that anything really is possible. We, and the way we think, are our only real limitations.

The mundane matrix of work and toil thus preceded with its usual unrelenting disconnection and mechanistic churn. This went on for a few months after the seminars. I had just finished a long day, though unexpectedly, I was feeling enamoured and full of life. Without a thought in my mind and a clear head, I went into the bathroom to look into my eyes facing the long mirror. Suddenly, I automatically, and quite intuitively, engaged in a continuous breath pattern whilst eye gazing in the mirror. This has been a very potent and strengthening Breathwork practice that I had been taught by the masters and have facilitated and guided to several clients previously. This time, on my own, it was different. Really different.

There is a point in continuous circular nasal breathing where you enter an ‘energy cycle’. At the many seminars I had attended and had shared experiences with other attendees this is well formulated, documented and experienced. In a single ‘Rebirthing Breathwork’ session you will have, or experience a single, or many, energy cycle(s). This one took on a whole new experience.

I felt a warm presence around me. The sensation was peculiar and new. My head was gently pushed to lower the crown of my head and forehead down, resting my chin on my navel. I felt an energetic presence more towards my right-side now. I hadn’t notice my breathing at all up to this point: I was completely unaware of any intention there. In my ears were some words spoken in English with a strong Indian accent: ‘You are doing very well’ and then a long pause ‘Learn patience’. As the words were spoken the sensation was overwhelming. It was full body. I can only explain the feeling as being kissed and caressed from the inside-out. It felt like nothing else I had ever experienced. It saturated, satisfied and overwhelmed all the senses simultaneously.

There was an overwhelming experience of deep peace thereafter. One of the most monumental and unanimous self-loving experiences that has ever occurred to me in this lifetime. Was this Babaji? Was this my mind? Am I going crazy…again?!

Who can you confront and tell this to? Let’s be honest, it’s not your regular ‘night-out story’, is it? And anyway, I really felt like that this was deeply for me and it was my purpose to really be present to this and own it. In my usual fashion, I allowed for a period of processing, integration and reflection to occur. A deep meditation. It was a few days later until I shared it with my guru, mentor and master (a direct descendent to Leonard). I approached my sister the following days thereafter – she has already acquired and understands breathwork techniques though the depth of this was something that really I wanted to share with only a very limited few. I couldn’t tell my girlfriend at the time, whom hadn’t done any of the work. I couldn’t tell my dear Mother, even though I was desperate to. Not only to always give her thanks so that I could be present to have these experiences, though maybe also not to worry her – she already feels like I’ve gone mad. I didn’t want to throw anymore fuel on the fire.

Fortunately, my dearest, all trusting and loving support-network came through. I received the clarification I required. The psychosis-settler. Immediately after I had to acknowledge Leonard: I felt gratitude for him and sent him a reminder of my very deep unconditional love. Leonard taught that Babaji can transmute and move through many incarnations at multiple times, as is his ever-presence and love that allow him to do so. This seemed now to make more sense.

My life, to date, has been about surrendering and balancing indoctrinated rational thought and scientific learning in order to seek observed non-judgemental patterns, opportunities and experiences with artistic flow, interpretation and creative abandonment. I guess the formulation of words to describe such events (as Leonard has already mentioned on many occasions to me) is really the mastery. Words really are limited in most cases. They’re just not enough. The five senses we rely on, so emphatically and in an almost mandatory servitude, are now only a stepping-stone to the actualisation of what we really can achieve. For example, Telepathy practiced unknowingly is now for certain: just think long and hard about someone you love dearly…they’ll be in touch very shortly.

On this note, when we surrender and let go of our limitations, then we only expand into greater skills: our aligning and universal purpose, our real skills and qualities. Most humans are in avoidance, unawake and still commit to suffering as a normality. Afraid to jump without a safety net being placed out in front, tested and with a valid up-to-date health and safety certificate attached. These transcended universal skills then get missed for another generation, or later. Whether through no fault of their own, traits such as ignorance, addiction and fake identifications still prevail to mask the deep personal work required to acknowledge and overcome the barriers to ‘knowing thyself’.

As one adopts this way of living and accessing these skills within themselves, you can clearly witness this through their eyes. In fact, no words or conversation need ever occur – you can actually have a conversation without speaking at all, just through the eyes! Give it a go: turn your mobile off for the day, don’t speak to anyone and just look deeply into their eyes when approached and smile (you may want to let some trusted ones know that you are performing this prior to undertaking such events…most that encounter you that day will sadly embrace the exchange with fear. The mind encourages us to ‘fear what we don’t know.).  Those few in heart will smile back at you, and maybe nod to you in acknowledgement. Without knowing it, you’ll end the day feeling truly invigorated and will have empowered many others without even realising. Your presence, ease and determination alone will suffice.

After all, ‘People can only meet you at the depth they are willing to meet themselves’. Spot this early and have compassion for those that aren’t so deep. Trust in your presence as a guide alone. Embrace your energies and share your energies with the ones that can meet you. Understanding personal sovereignty and boundaries all of a sudden becomes important in actual daily life practice. Knowledge of these boundaries can only be accessed by deep inner work and healing of childhood and karmic traumas.

I continually give thanks and gratitude to those that have helped me access and heal these areas, so that I can strengthen and assist in helping others. I continually give thanks to Leonard and his masters for deepening my knowledge and understanding of this to allow me to overcome my limiting beliefs, supporting these unhealed areas. Oh, remember to have as much fun, laugh and take the Michael out of yourself as well whilst doing all of the following: another download from Leonard. You are supposed to have fun, remaining lighter after all! What a paradox.

Leonard’s teachings of spiritual purification and ritual, utilising the elements, love and mantra yoga are the way to access these qualities. From the outset, this ‘aint no joy-ride’ - I’ll be honest with you. Multiple ego and level deaths can be outrageously unpleasant and tricky. Birth, life, senility and death consciousness all need to be faced, accepted and our attachment or relationship to them, reinstituted. It is only when we (and I personally) lose sight of these rituals, is that we fall back into subconscious and unconscious habits, disconnection and, all of a sudden, things start feeling difficult and mundane. Time really becomes a limitation again. The universe is suddenly against us - Cry God for Harry, England and St George! Damn I was doing so well… what happened?!

Of course, the universe isn’t against us, it’s just sending us a few more lessons to observe and see whether we’ve understood. When we lose sight of ‘what do I need to learn here?’, we’re usually off-track or have accepted contraction as a normality – after all isn’t that easier? Well, ultimately, no…you may have to reincarnate with the same enemies in your life, only this time they’ll be your parents or kids! Adapting these rituals and learnings and facilitating them for others to start using is my particular personal purpose here, as with many others. Ironically, it is usually myself needing to swallow my own medicine the most. Isn’t it always hilarious, I find, in the case that as facilitators we are the ones that are the best at remedying others in perhaps what we are requiring for our innermost selves?

Thus, by serving others, you really do serve yourself. Oh, and by the way, we are all facilitators and healers if we hadn’t realised already. We all have the power to self-heal and help assist others. We all do in our own little ways. A huge challenge arises for any facilitator when surrounded by modern city life and an increasing disconnection in humanity. Though how soon is now? (Thank you Daniel Pinchbeck). Now really is the only time for such radical change, or should I say, recalibration and rehabilitation of the ancient and pre-existing wisdom. Delivered with patience, trust and balance. Truth, simplicity and love.

What does this look like for the self? Really, being kind and graceful and a practice towards self-love and giving generously to yourself all the love, praise and support you need. When this is no longer flowing, give a smile or help another person achieve something without any expectation. This will help you access again. We are all connected and a reflection of each other. What do I need to learn from the person that is now facing me, about myself? What can I give to them freely, lovingly and without expectation? Am I even asking these questions? Is this too deep?

Having a support network of other vibrational energies that are on your ‘wave-length’ to whom you can access and go to, is of vital importance – a spiritual family or community. Close to a modern day ‘tribe’ though this tribe ideology varies slightly on more of an agreement principle rather than a deep trust and acceptance which is provided unconditionally by the spiritually awake. Mastery then comes from the delivery of such experiences and our ability to share these with others, awakening others to their calling.

My guru and master has a different teaching manner that enables her to almost start the seminar series as a fully-nurturing Mother, suckling her babies, By the end of the course, her interaction may only be a few minutes of presence during the week, by which time the participants are free adults that have learnt to be independent and courageous individuals. And, by the way, this is served up to all age ranges, race, sex, nationality, etc. Quite amazing to observe. Other masters and facilitators have incorporated subtle energy-flow moving practices, changes in delivery and breath guidance. Sometimes subtle, some much more obvious. Indeed, this fractionation then moves further from Leonard’s core principles that were laid down through all his work in setting-up Rebirthing Breathwork International. Now the globe is all about the breath, particularly it’s awareness, though there is no denying that core quality principles will always eventually be returned to for repeated and effective personal transformation and healing.

Leonard left his body a few weeks back now. I hadn’t managed to see him during the year. It was about last year at the same time that I was able to look him deep in the eyes, hold his hand and thank him for his inspiring courage. Again, his smile was infectious. I was so thrilled to have known him and observed him in his last six years of his recent presence. His work has really infiltrated and permeated into my life and enabled my adaption into my alignment and purpose. There is so much bullshit and complication in the world now. There really is no denying the Truth. There is no denying the beauty and joy in the Simple things (not by any such coincidence a message my Grandfather had downloaded to me four days prior to his passing at the same time the year before). There is no denying that Love has the ability to go higher, further and wider than fear. These are the three simple mantra messages provided through the chanted name of God: Om Namaha Shivaya. The name really does keep on expanding us: in truth, simplicity and love. Whenever I am lost or off-centre, simply chanting this to myself quietly brings me back into peace and equilibrium. Everything is as it is meant to be. Let it be. I am exactly where I am meant to be right now.

Two nights prior to his passing, I was in Santa Monica, Los Angeles. I had lovingly prepared some amazing Californian produce for a mini banquet with a Professor of Anthropology, an Arts Professor and a phenomenal woman whom is strategically mastering the rehabilitation of the planet through the living embodiment of unity consciousness – whether she realises this or not, is another matter! This was not just a seemingly clever crowd, this was an intelligent collaboration to which I was placed amongst. I felt really honoured to be there, though I remained unattached and in observance. Leonard was very present in my awareness all of a sudden. It was as though his work and message needed to be delivered and spread to those that were ready to receive it: though this time it wasn’t to fall on deaf ears – these were ears that listened rather than heard.

I understand the difference now between intelligence and cleverness, similar to that of choice and decision, similar to that of knowing and curiosity. The former are all heart-centred, deeper understandings, almost intuition (‘I don’t know why, I just know’). The latter come from the mind’s influence and are based on subconscious and indoctrinated projections remedied to make social interaction acceptable or solution-based. This is why mind mastery and meditation are not only fascinating to me, they are so important to allow the mind to calm and remain unattached to judgement or subconscious thinking, so that the heart and intuitive downloads and messages can easily channel through: they can be verbalised, conceptualised, and, better still, acted upon. All of these people were ‘in action’. All were thriving not surviving. All had blurred the lines of work-life balance: there wasn’t a division, just a loving and joyful presence in their being.

Leonard, and my master, have taught me to speak from heart. This never lies or complicates. It is truth, undistorted from the mind. Accessing this energy and being able to deliver it either to a single person, small or large group, is what distinguishes mastery and leadership. Courage comes directly from the heart. Those that really listen and are working with presence and intelligence sniff bullshit and clever mind practices for breakfast – you’ll lose them, and the universe, and maybe never get the chance again. Fortunately, I was loved and supported on this occasion. Leonard’s work, as a result, will expand and carry-on through strategic investment and learned direction that will satisfy mind analysts, thinkers, philanthropists and anthropologists alike.

I’ve learnt that before I start any answer to a good question from others, by watching Leonard, and instructed from my master, I take a deep long breath through the nose and to ‘feel’ where the breath ‘goes’. It will most likely deliver the energy where you need it most, calm the mind and centre the response. Again, feel free to give it a go. It works. Again, I felt extremely honoured and blessed that he was with me, especially, at this particular moment.

The day I learnt that he had passed, I was taken to a multi-faith shrine near Malibu (this followed after with a homage visit to Spirit Rock, near Merin County, a few days later) It was a beautiful place to reflect, meditate and be at one with him. Indeed, as a place, that was its intended purpose and function. I somehow felt close to Leonard too as he had spent the majority of his life on the West Coast: a place I have always visited with great optimism, expansion and the opportunity to make change. As I strolled the grounds in silence, warmth and peace, my attention was drawn to a figure of Krishna (the eighth incarnation of the Hindu god Vishnu) playing the flute. I smiled. I remembered how all the people whom had really inspired me in my life I adored for their mischievous pranks, being seemingly miracle performers and slayers of demons. This was akin to those characteristics of the early Krishna (and Leonard). I then knew that this was also my purpose reinforced, again, being mirrored to me. Another clear message, reminded if only when we have the vision to see it. It also was a reminder for me to remain light and not so serious. Personally, this is when I know I am out of alignment. I get frustrated. You don’t need eyes to see, or ears to hear if you haven’t awoken from your bed of unconscious sleep.

The plaque below Krishna’s statue read: ‘He who perceives Me everywhere and beholds everything in Me never loses sight of Me, nor do I ever lose sight of him.’. Wow! He was here again with me all of a sudden. Though what did I need to learn? What was I holding back from my true purpose? Why was I steel feeling bouts of pain, attachment and frustration on my journey?

After a few nights of difficult and interrupted sleep in the following week, I was back in California again. It was about the tenth night following his passing that he then came to me in a dream. I was sat on a sofa next to him. He was still in his old body and familiar features and face though his energy-body was radiant and alive. He was in his mid-eighties. He got up and ran up some steps in the room like he was floating – I struggled to keep up. He wasn’t full of words, just his aura and energy spoke clearly. There was an overwhelming message again of patience in all his movements and actions. There was also the usual cheekiness to remind me that you can still just enjoy the ride, don’t get so hell-bent on the results or outcomes. If you find yourself becoming too serious, lighten up. Being present and doing nothing is often, and quite ironically, everything that is actually needed. I was then shown a video on Tibet and handed his phone book of contacts he had acquired throughout his life (millions of people) whereby I preceded to accidentally ring Mel Gibson!  Leonard smiled.

He removed himself from the parked sofa position and descended to take up a frog’s pose with squatted leaping position on the floor in front of me. He then spoke the only words during the whole dream: ‘Watch. I’m going to show you now what twenty years looks like.’. He leap-frogged and jumped six times consecutively, whilst rolling a six-sided die (singular dice) in front of him after each leap. The leaps were quick with a small pause. It was incredible to witness. He got up from the activity like he had enough energy to fly around the planet six times and come back to here in a single breath, or a blink of an eye. Again, he turned and smiled. My heart melted.

The frog symbolically and spiritually symbolises the signal as a time of rebirth or renewal. The frog can thrive both in water and on land: it simply lets us know that we are also inclined to navigate between physical, emotional and spiritual planes, finding joy in life and nature. The leaping of Leonard in a straight direction indicating the years going by symbolically may be interpreted as commitment and direction, jumping from one thing to another and foregoing distractions (often where many of us come unstuck and disconnected again and again). The dice in a dream usually signifies our fortune: rolling the dice means we are taking some risks and playing with our fate – good job Leonard was rolling my dice for me then! I’m in good hands! The die was also increasingly staggered with every leap – the risks were clearly going to get greater as I progressed, upon life’s great journey. This made sense. We are given exactly what we can handle.

What did I need to learn from this? Firstly: the energy body, despite what the rest of the physical body is showing is the key to ‘physical immortality’ at its essence and this is often what is misinterpreted  – why do I keep meeting so many seemingly physical ‘elderly’ bodied individuals whom are so ‘young at heart’ and whose eyes are glistening with the burning desire ‘to live’ and ‘experience’ so much more? Less we forget, life really is a gift. Secondly: don’t lose sight of your greater purpose and restrict your avenue of focus – we are all connected, we have so many other brothers and sisters to meet, so many others that we can learn from, connect with and give to. Thirdly: don’t get lost in the over-complication and thinking your way through life – life may just pass you by without you realising. I’m reminded of John Lennon’s famous words ‘Life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans’. Be here now. Fourthly: there is always help when you need it and you have the ability to draw in anyone you need to assist you, including Mel Gibson, or even Sting!

Leonard’s work now carries-on and has metamorphosed into all ‘our’ different skills: those of us that have opted to spread the practices and aid in its facilitation. I use it to assist my master in aligning our goals in the delivery of this information; to guide me in the practice of helping and assisting others; and also the direction of my further studies and literature.

The masters, friends and I go to scatter his ashes amongst all the other immortals and Gods in their rightful place, near Hairakhan, across from Guatama Ganga, Northern India at the beginning of March. No doubt, another epic experience, adventure and perhaps a book. Maybe the new Babaji will come and join us? I hope he comes to you soon.

‘Keep me away from the wisdom which does not cry, the philosophy which does not laugh, and the greatness which does not bow before children.’

K. Gibran

Once, a great navel ship sailed into the port. On the hill-side, over-looking the sea, a crowd had gathered to watch the ship’s return. Among them was a small child, who was waving to the ship.

An adult, standing nearby, asked the child: ‘Who are you waving to?’.

The child answered: ‘I’m waving to the Captain of the ship.’

The man said: ‘Do you think the Captain of such a great ship would notice a small child, like you?’

‘I’m sure of it.’ Said the child.

‘Why?’ Said the man.

‘You see…’, said the child, ‘…the Captain of the ship is my Father’.


Written by

Dr Ben Mather